Sunday, November 20, 2005

LIGHT BLOGGING AHEAD You can expect light blogging here at CUDGELAND for the next few weeks.

But we'll be back at full strength by the middle of December. And we hope, at that point, to be able to bring you news of some interesting developments.

Friday, November 11, 2005

WEDDING WITHDRAWAL? The Indianapolis Star documents a peculiar phenomenon:
Dear Hap LeCrone: I have been married for about a month, and I feel like I am missing something in my life. I spent months planning the "perfect" wedding, and now that I'm married and it's over, I really don't know what to do with myself. Because I'm a "wife" and not the "bride," I feel empty, maybe even depressed.

I imagined that marriage would be the most wonderful thing in the world, but I miss the life that I once had. I love my husband, but I find myself crying without knowing why, and my husband is worried that I am unhappy with him. I feel confused, let down and sad. Why do I feel this way, and can I snap out of it? -- E.M. from Texas

Dear Reader: What you seem to be experiencing could be called "wedding withdrawal" or the "post-wedding blues."

For the last several months, you have been anticipating a wonderful and significant life event, your wedding. You have probably spent a lot of time planning the details -- the flowers, the cake, your dress and so on.

Although this was one of the most important weekends of your life, your wedding is only a small part of a bigger picture, your marriage! Many brides and grooms get so caught up in the details of planning their wedding that they neglect to plan for what a marriage is really about.
That's a new one. (There's more.)

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

HOW TO POSTPONE? The Shreveport Times tackles the sensitive issue of how to postpone or end your wedding engagement.

Some strategies:

--"We need to talk about something important to us both. There are some areas of our relationship that continue to cause me to doubt our compatibility. For the sake of both our happiness, maybe we should put our wedding plans on hold while we work on these issues. Maybe I need to get counseling from a third party professional. I’ll let you know when we can talk again. Maybe you will want to do the same."

--"Deciding to share one’s life experiences with another is a major decision that can result in happiness or disappointment. Marriage is a lifelong commitment and I want us to do all that we know to do before we continue with wedding plans. If we know something is not right before the wedding, it seems there may be more that may come up after the wedding. If it isn’t going to be good for both of us, then we need to know now."

--"There is something that continues to bother me and our commitment for marriage has become scary. I want marriage to be a lifetime of happiness and for now I need to have some time to think without having firm wedding plans. Maybe premarital counseling will be best for me, if not for us, and for now the ring needs to be returned."